I also have that exact story. Got a bunch of drugs, hired a prostitute. After she left, took a crazy concoction I thought for sure would kill me. I’ll never forget what I thought was my last breath. All I could feel was immense regret. My brain kept reminding me of all the little things I had to live for that for some reason I couldn’t think of at any moment before. I woke up the next day feeling like death, but I’ve never felt better to be alive. 7 years later and I remember it all like it was yesterday. I would never recommend anyone to go to that length to feel something, but I understand why it happens. Unfortunately too many people take that final breath and don’t wake back up. Find a good therapist to talk to. If that’s not an option then a family member or friend. The people who share that story all got lucky to a degree. If you don’t feel you have anyone if your life to reach out to, feel free to reach out to me or any trusted community you find on the internet. It may seem silly to talk to a complete stranger on the internet in that way, but there are an overwhelming number of real people here and not just bots lol.